Finished with the commissioned halter top.

I am so ridiculously proud of myself. This turned out about ten times better than anything I've done in a while, I think. It's even nicer than the ZigZag Halter.

This is about a child's size 4. Caron's Simply Soft again, in berry blue & grape, two great colors. I used a 4.5mm hook for the bodice and the first four rows and then switched to a 5mm hook for the rest of it, as the Mama says her daughter's got a little potbelly. I wanted to make sure there was enough room.

I frogged the bottom part, the ripple, countless times. I truly have no clue how often. I had a heckuva time getting the correct number of stitches to base the ripple on, and I also kept getting distracted while I was working on the first ripple row and thusly messing up. And then when I got all of that ironed out, I wound up frogging the first four rows of the ripple stitch because the way I was holding it, the wrong side of the fabric was coming out toward the right side of the garment. So I had to frog the first few stitches a couple of more times to figure out exaclty how I should be holding the blessed thing.

But I finally finished it. And I'm very happy with it. The photo isn't the greatest, so it's kind of hard to tell, but on the last round I put a picot instead of the c-1 space at the increase. It's subtle, but it gives it a nice finish which, I think, enhances the overall pointyness of the design.

I will also use this space to give a belated shout out and thanks to the Crochet Mafia. I left the thread where I was accused of copyright infringement right before I made that entry into my blog, so I didn't see the people who apparently jumped in to defend me. I only learned about it today. I just want to say thanks to all of you. I do indeed appreciate it.

A commission

I have a commission from a lady at Mama Drama to make her daughter a halter top. She was contemplating buying the Berry Halter outright, but her kid is just a little too big for it, so she opted for a custom design. So I'm making for her the ZigZag Halter, but in the colors (purple & blue) from the Berry Halter. Totally cool. I'm really looking forward to it. I have the top part finished already, & I'll start on the bottom tomorrow. I told her I'd need a week to do it, but I think I'll be finished much more quickly. Which is good. Underpromise & overdeliver. I am trying to make that my mantra, as far as business is concerned. I added in a little purse with the ZigZag Halter when I sold it. I don't think I'll do that every time, but sometimes it's good.

I have to do some math to figure out exactly how many stitches I need for the bottom part. I'm thinking an extra six, as it takes six to make a half of the zigzag pattern, but maybe it's an extra 12. The pattern I base mine off of I think is a 12-st repeat. But that's flat, and I work these in the round. That makes it a wee bit more difficult.

See, kids, you really willuse math in real life. It's actually algebra, sort of. How many stitches do I need to have my pattern come out perfect? It's kinda hard with ripple stitches, because they're a two-part deal. Down, and then up. (The way I work, anyhow. I don't know why I start that way.) You have to start with one and make sure you finish up with the other, so it's a complete unit all the way around.

I love the way ripples look, but I find them fiendishly hard to do.

One of these days I'll do a zigzag two-rectangle poncho in Fun Fur and combine all the banes of my crochet existence into one...

My poor daughters...

I am seriously considering making these for Easter:
They're strangely cute. I don't know why these dresses appeal to me. I guess it's the tacky crocheter in me. Or maybe that they don't look like the sort of thing I usually make on my own (I tend towards stuff that's much plainer).

The first one is out of the latest issue of Hooked on Crochet, the other from the latest Crochet World (the one I liked a lot more than everyone else at Crochetville). I really want to make them, but I honestly don't think I'll have the time.

I am thinking, sales-wise, I am going to seriously start concentrating on halter tops. I have now a commission for a custom version of the Berry Halter shown a couple of entries ago. Lady liked it, but it's just a bit too small for her daughter, so I'll be making it to order, bar her changing her mind. And I doubt she will. Because of course, my taste is so poor that no one likes what I do. Except, you know, the people who want to buy the halter tops.

Halter tops. Who'd have thought they'd be popular? (OK, two isn't like overwhelmingly popular or anything, but when that's what sells...) Well, obviously, I had an inkling, but still...I really need to get the pattern written up and see about submitting it. Or selling it. Whichever.

I'm working on a poncho right now. Oddly, the simplest version, the two rectangles sewn together, baffles me when it comes time to sew up the second seam. I got it figured out, though not before convincing myself I'm an idiot when it comes to ponchos. (Ah well, at least I can spell it.) It's hot pink. I'll be trimming it in black and then sewing on some flowers made in several different colors. If it doesn't sell, it can be a nice wrap for one of the girls when we're somewhere it's chilly (it's often chilly indoors). I'm also working on a very basic shrug for Esther, something I can keep rolled up in my purse for use again in those cold buildings. Both projects, though, are gonna be shelved until I get the custom order done. Paying customers come first, of course. If the Esther shrug turns out well enough, I'll post the pattern over at C'ville. An infant-sized shrug isn't anything I've seen before, though of course I doubt I'm the only person to think of it.

I had the most wonderful dream last night...

I spent most of the night crocheting and went to bed with hook marks still on my fingers. In my dream Rob & I were at an antique store, and not only did I find a vintage F hook (with a lovely fluted handle), but there was a huge stack of pattern books and magazines at the store as well. The strange thing about the dream--and there must be something strange in every dream, mustn't there?--is that these publications were all kept behind the counter, and when I asked the saleslady to give them to me so that I could look at them, she gave me a few of them but also some knitting magazines and also--here is the very strange part--some Christian books. More of those than anything else, and I got the distinct feeling in the dream that she was trying to convert me. Which is odd, as I'm already Christian. (Episcopalian, to be exact. Here, have some coffee.)

It occurs to me that I have a wealth of crochet publications in real life, and I haven't made fun of them for a while. So it's time for another round of that.

But first, your Moment of Crochet Zen:
Knit Simple spring/summer 2006

Click on that link. Behold the cover of the spring/summer issue of Knit Simple. A knitting magazine. Read and savor the largest headline on the cover:

fresh picked!
easy crocheted flowers for pretty knits

Yep. Easy crocheted flowers. It is a knitting magazine featuring...crocheted flowers. I love it.

Now, on to the magazines and books:

First up, the February 2006 issue of Hooked on Crochet! Hey, ladies, it is your grandmother's crochet! Aren't I glad. I won't speak too much of this, since I also have the current issue in my lap. I'll just say that I adore the hooded baby poncho, and if it wasn't, well, Hawaii here, I'd make it for Esther.

Next, the February 2006 issue of Annie's Favorite Crochet. I haven't seen the March issue yet, but it's out, according to the website. Anything related to Annie's Attic always has plenty to make fun of, and this issue of course is no exception. I think someone in Big Sandy is smoking Fun Fur. (It's nowhere near Houston, so that can't explain it.) Again, please excuse the images I am about to provide; we don't have a scanner at the moment so I'm stuck photographing shiny magazine paper.
First thought: Hey look, it's that chick who played Winnie on The Wonder Years. Second thought: How many shag rugs had to die for that wrap? This photo really doesn't do it total justice. You can't see much of the long stringy things hanging off the bottom, but it seems as if the rug(s?) resisted valiantly. It is, of course, made using Fun Fur. But not the chintzy Lion Brand Fun Fur! Oh no, this is Moda Dea Fun Fur. Nevermind that such does not exist. (Moda Dea does make fur yarn, but nothing with the same name as the Lion Brand product.) They apparently mean Fur Ever yarn (I matched up colorway names, at least). The mix-up in names hints to me that they switched yarns from what the designer intended. The Moda Dea yarn doesn't seem to be any more expensive than the Lion Brand stuff, just a bit more difficult to find (really, when was the last time you saw Moda Dea anything at Wal-Mart?) Because, of course, nothing sets off your butt-ugly design like elitism.

It gets worse, much worse, on the very next page, though. Turn the page and you are confronted with this monstrosity:
Apparently, some sort of alien fungus has attacked this poor, defenseless denim skirt. My God, I just realized there are beads on this. Beads. On eyelash yarn (just generic eyelash yarn this time, not FunFurSure). Wow. It is worse than even I thought.

You will notice that there is some hope for mankind. The aliens have not yet managed to infect the back of the skirt. And in some ways that is worse. Because you could come up behind this lady and think she was just a normal, law-abiding citizen. You would never know she's been colonized by the Alien Bead Moss until it was too late.

Luckily, if I know my HG Wells well enough, Earth germs will eventually triumph.

What, you may be wondering, is the perfect accessory to set off your lovely Skirt Fungus? Why, this, of course!
Riddle me this, Batman:
Does the hideous headband cancel out the scare hair? Sort of like when you touch your doppelganger, the theory is you might both wink out of existence.

Or perhaps it's a different strain of the alien moss?

Just for a minute, put these three hideous creations together in your mind. The wrap. The trim. The headband. Imagine one person wearing all three. It could happen. Someone, somewhere, looked at these same patterns and thought to herself, Man, they go together!

The aliens, my friends, are winning. They have already assimilated the crew over at Crochet! I reported some time back on the attack of the supermodels. It seems that with this new issue, their takeover is complete.

Mind you, I actually kind of likethis dress. Except for, you know, the rug-fringe on the bottom and the inexplicable fuzziness of the straps/bodice trim.

But you pair the minidress with the fishnets and the "Howdy sailor, new in town?" shoes and the pillbox hat (which has a gorgeous little veil) and the elbow-length gloves, and it occurs to me for the first time that this issue could well be called Crochet for Streetwalkers.

Crochet for Dying-of-Starvation Streetwalkers, more like. Chick looks like she hasn't eaten in a month. I mean, Barbie's looking at her and shaking her head in disbelief.

Seriously, though, I'd make this dress for myself. If it didn't mean lots of math to recreate it in my actual size. Large fits up to a 40 inch bust. Let's just say there are certain undergarments I have to get made-to-order 'cause they're not generally available in stores. (And I'm not like hugely fat either; I'm a size 16, only one above the nationwide norm of 14.)

As a parting thought, I will note how incrediblyflattering horizontal stripes are for those of us not weak from hunger.

Next exhibit in the Crochet for Streetwalkers theme:
This particular...lady...apparently has lost the fight with the Alien Skirt Moss.

Really, it's almost too easy. They make this stuff too easy for me. The people at Crochet! claim to be defining the craft. Which, I assume, means it's Today's Crochet and of course Not Your Grandmother's Crochet. Once again, Granny is heartily thankful.

I can't get over the sheer...surrealness of this particular model. Methinks the photographer went a little overboard with the airbrush tool. And I think she stole the hairdresser's boyfriend. Because someone did that to her eyebrows on purpose.

Final bit of Streetwalker Crochet:
Unfortunately, I took a bad photo of this one, foolishly zooming in somewhat on the skirt, so you don't get the full effect of the camisole top. Really, ladies, the whole underwear-as-outerwear thing is soover. Not even Madonna is doing it anymore.

For the record, this is another pattern I sort of like. Except for the ubiquitous Fun Fur trim. (WTF isit with Fun Fur, anyway? Do they have a whole room full of compromising photos of the foremost crochet designers or something?) Oh wait, my bad. That's Moonlight Mohair. Oy. So it's not just inexplicably fuzzy yarn, it's inexplicably fuzzy yarn that itches.

This is also another design made for the starving supermodel crowd. It comes in three sizes: 2, 4/6, and 8/10. I dunno about y'all, but most of the other crocheters I know are notsize 10s anymore than I am! Way to market to the minority! (I've said before and I'll say it again: only in the fashion industry can you get away with aiming 90% of your product at 40% of your perspective consumers.)

Thankfully, though, ugly sweaters are still available.

Once again: They make this too easy for me!

Where to start, where to start?

Oh hey, that hideous fuzzy thing comes in my size! Yay! Because of course us fat chicks look sogood in bulky stuff. I wanna wear it with my boffo Quacker Factory embellished sweatsuit.

The first words uttered by the baby in the middle: Please, Mommy, no!

I fuzzed out the face of the poor child in the last photograph. No one should risk being recognized while wearing that. Seriously, it ought to count as child abuse. Because if you send you child to school wearing that, she willget the crap beaten out of her for being a dork. I mean, really. As if the very concept of a fuzzy crocheted jacket wasn't bad enough, the sleeves are a different color! Might as well tape a "kick me" sign to your child's back.

Next, we come to the April 2006 issue of Crochet World, wherein we learn once again just how different I am from my Crochetville.org peers.

Once upon a time, when I was in San Antonio visiting my mother, she gave my eldest daughter a very special stuffed frog. The unique feature of this frog was that it was furry. A furry amphibion. Special.

Quirky the Blue Bird is likewise special. Because he, too, is furry. Fun Fur-ry, even. (I know, the Fun Fur people are Reptilians.) I think this is about the ugliest toy pattern I've come across lately, but everybodyelse in the thread loved it.

Of course, this means that they all have zero taste. Because I am the sole arbiter of what is good crochet.

Well, me and Lady Linoleum, of course.

This magazine also brings the Inexplicable Crochet Patterns of the Quarter:
First we have Clay Pot Annie. A wall hanging, apparently. A "charming but 'potty' little lass" who will enliven my kitchen. Well, not my kitchen. But someone's. Someone with a deep, abiding love for pompons. And plastic flowers.

Then, you have the Baby Set for the Stupid. "Geez, honey, I forgot, did we have a boy or a girl?"

Now, I'll be the first to admit that I've thought about putting a t-shirt that says "I'm a GIRL!" on my daughters, as putting them in frilly pink dresses has never been enough of a clue. But really, this is taking it a bit far, as some of this stuff isn't even meant to be used outside of the house. Of course, industriously crocheting this set and then giving it at the baby shower pretty much guarantees the ultrasound will be wrong.

And the lactivist in me has to note the subtle pushing of bottlefeeding...

Thankfully, that's about all I can find to ridicule in that issue.

Last for tonight, this month's issue of Hooked on Crochet! I will make it brief.
Now, the purse really isn't that bad. Except for the yarns. And the giant button. And the knot in the strap, normally something you punish your children for, not something you do to your own purse on purpose.

And, of course, the fact that they expect you to hold together two strands of bulky-weight yarn & use an H hook to crochet 'em.

More egregious is the hairy child's poncho. It uses not one but two furry yarns--neither Fun Fur, oddly enough. And the whole thing looks oddly stiff, as if you merely cut a hole in some carpet for your daughter to wear. This reminds me of the MWTer who told me about being traumatized by the crocheted garments her mom forced her to wear.

My contribution to the ugly amigurumi craze...

I may make ugly pigs, but damn I make cute babies. This, of course, is Esther (and doesn't she look wonderfully alert & grown since her last appearance in this blog?) with Kalua (as in the barbequed pork, not the coffee liquer) in her lap.

I was originally planning to sell the pig on my MWT store (link in the sidebar, since I just got a comment asking about it), but it just turned out too ugly. One of the legs is 14 sts around, and the other one is 15 sts around--still not sure how I added in that extra stitch. The arms are sewn on oddly, and the amigurumi-style eyes give the whole thing a distinctly evil cast. So I really don't think it would sell, but that's a-OK, because Esther adores it. And I learned a lot about how I'm going to be making amigurumi in the future. I stumbled across a miniature Cabbage Patch Kid that I adore the size and proportions of, so I matched the pig up to it, roughly. I'll be doing that in the future since it turned out so well in that regard. The heads are going to be bigger, though (I liked all that doll's proportions). Here's a close-up of Kalua's head:
The nostrils turned out kind of off-center. I'm still not certain how that happened.

OK, technical stuff: I made the pig from Caron Simply Soft using a 4mm hook. I made the head from the snout down, and used actual embroidery thread to embroider the features. For the ears, I crocheted in one loop only where I wanted them to go, so I'd have a loop free to come back to later. Then I attached the yarn and crocheted them in place. I finished off the head in what is now the back, then joined the yarn on the bottom and crocheted the neck & torso from there. To close up the torso, I did a row of sc through both the front & the back of the last round, then to make the first leg I merely crocheted in first the front loop only and then the back loop only of the single row, did 10 rows of sc in pink then two in black, reduced in black once, stuffed, & sewed the leg closed. The arms were crocheted seperately from the hoof up & sewn on.

***

I swear, I don't try to create drama. But it sure seems to be finding me lately. As I mentioned before, I asked for feedback for my crochet store. Part of that feedback included, unbeknownst to me, someone hotlinking to a photograph of a blanket and doll. (I don't think either was crocheted, but honestly I didn't look that closely, so the blanket might have been.) Understandably, a relative of the woman who owned the photo tracked the thread down and complained. The photo was taken down immediately--the poster didn't have a clue what she was doing was illegal, and the admin had thus far not known what was going on either.

Anyway, to shorten the story somewhat, admin decided to make a general announcement that we shouldn't hotlink images or infringe upon copyright. Stupid me decided to point out that you cannot copyright an idea. So now I've had some dolt accuse me of advertising my willingness to violate someone's copyright by copying their idea. Now, I don't do this to begin with. I have zero interest in packaging blankets and dolls together. I have little interest in making blankets, for that matter. I did volunteer to take custom orders, and said that as part of showing me what you wanted, you could use photos to point me in the right direction. Which, of course, was interpreted as "I'll make exactly the same thing." Well, it was interpreted that way by this one person, who is now waging her own little "Sabra is evil" campaign.

Let me be clear. I do not LIKE drama. I want no part in drama. I take incredible offense, however, at the accusation that I am infringing on anyone's copyright. I am not. This particular woman understands most aspects of copyright (though she is apparently clueless on how it applies to handicrafts), but is totally clueless about crochet. And this is the perfect example which occurred to me last night (because, like most people, the brilliant comebacks occur to me after the fact): right now I have in my possession at least three different patterns for "crocheted Mary Janes". And by that I mean just the baby bootie version. There's a version in the issue of Annie's Favorite Crochet Patterns on my bedtable, another in a bootie booklet, and one I'm positive of in my large collection of books. And I'm pretty darned sure there are more lurking in there somewhere. Of course, this doesn't speak of the many versions I know to exist online. They all look alike, and most of them use the exact same weight of yarn, and I'd be surprised if they didn't share a hook size or two. But none of them have infringed upon anyone else's copyright. No more than the shrug I can buy at Wal-Mart infringes upon the rights of whoever makes the shrugs Lane Bryant sells!

Happier Things

I have one more project to share, another toddler halter top:

I used Caron Simply Soft Brites for this one, & a 4.5 mm hook. It's a variant on the pattern I made for the last halter top you saw in this space. The top is exactly the same except for being striped. The bottom is a variant on the ZigZag Lozenge stitch from the Harmony Guide's 300 Crochet Stitches, which, by the way is not a violation of copyright. There are several more photos of it in my MomsWhoThink store, where it's up for sale. Because, of course, it's winter and no one will buy a halter top. Nevermind that a halter top is all I've actually sold. (I appeared for a brief time to have a commission for a hat, but I haven't heard from the member in several days...)

D'oh.

Forgot I linked my store to my blog. Violated marketing 101 there. Nothing connected with your business can be in the slightest bit personal. Just got reamed for being unwilling to lower my prices. Oh well, as far as that is concerned. Yeah, if you walked past a store that had a sign saying "I could lower my prices, but I won't", you'd go right past. But know what? It's a two-way relationship. You're probably not the sort of customer the store is looking for, not if you think they should underprice themselves.

I listed the Lemon Lovely Dress on Etsy. Perhaps I will have better luck there. The blog issue was a big one, but I do still think that my main problem with MomsWhoThink is that they know me too well. I've got it paid for another two months, but after that I will close it. I went ahead and said that I would make items outside of my usual size range on commission, and I am glad I didn't waste money making anything. Because of course I got plenty of "Well, if you had this I'd buy it" but when I said to contact me and I'd make it, nothing happened. (And all of this happened outside of the blowup over the blog, so I do not think the two are related.)

I did, at least, have the sense to remove my blog link from my store. Won't make that mistake again. Of course, the damage has already ben done, 'cause the gal was so helpful as to take quotes from my blog and post them there. How nice that she had the class to do that instead of saying something privately. I mean, I did have one member choose to be critical privately. And that's OK. Honestly, I know not everyone is going to like what I do, and I'm fine with that.

But I hate it when someone decides to be a backbiting bitch under guise of being helpful. I cannot--and will not--argue that her point was valid. (Though I was not complaining about either my nonexistent customers or saying anything bad about my work, as I was accused of doing.) Linking my blog to my store and expecting to still be able to be honest on it was stupid. But that violates an unwritten rule at that site that you leave what's outside of MWT outside of MWT. I can see no motivation behind it other than to damage any hope of success I might have had, which is honestly leaving me sitting here wondering what on Earth I did to her. I suppose that will teach me to try to support someone through an initially difficult pregnancy and then tell her how cute her babies are!

I have been thinking about it more, and I realize now that opening up a store on MomsWhoThink was a bad idea overall. The main part of that site is still a debate site, and so I run the risk of people deciding to not consider buying from me based on my debate positions. It's not something I would ever do, but honestly that is the only thing I can see that might have happened with her. I'm not entirely stupid, y'know. I did stop myself from changing my avatar to something political (and I'm talking reallypolitical, far hotter than the whole red vs blue thing) because it wasn't a good idea when I'm also trying to promote a business on the same site.

In other, possibly brighter, news, Robert said he's gotten some small interest in what I make from the people he works with, and he wants me to make up some business cards. I'm loathe to do that, as my stuff hasn't exactly been selling like hotcakes and I really don't want to get the kick of uninterest yet again. But perhaps I should. I've been thinking about making up a brochure with things.

I've also had a couple of requests for toys and beanies. So I'm going to work on some amigurumi and see if there is any interest in them. I don't want to make just "normal" stuff. Normal has never been my forte. So, hopefully, this will be a nice bridge. What to do about the beanies, I've not a clue. I'm thinking to make a few more things like the ones I created for Clara and Eleanor, as Mindi really liked those (and they were free, of course).

I also need to get a gallery website set up so that I can have something to use as a show-and-tell of my work that doesn't link here. Because I have learned that lesson.

And today's question is...

Do I make what potential customers have said they want to see, and hope they actually buy it (keeping in mind they were all excited about the prospect of what I am making before I made it)? Or do I keep making what I want to make and hope I find a buyer?

This isn't an easy question.

I got set up at HyenaCart. BellaLinda Designs there too, of course. And I've gotten a few very nice comments. Not that comments count for anything, 'cause of course you don't make money off of them. I never expected to get rich off this, of course, but I did have the fond dream that my crochet habit would eventually become self-sustaining and I'd be able to create without amassing a huge number of things that would go unused.

Let me tell you this story to further illustrate my conundrum:

One of the feedback comments went something like this: "...since it is the dead of Winter for many of us, crocheted halter tops just aren't on our minds as we battle the heating bills." Valid feedback of course. And yet...And yet, a halter top is the only thing I have sold! Oy. Sadly, I am very easily discouraged, and am tempted to shutter my MomsWhoThink store altogether. I know I also battle familiarity there. I've been on that site as long as that site has existed, very nearly six years now. It's about like selling to your family.

It's frustrating. One of the projects of which I am most proud, the Lemon Lovely Dress, got this comment: "The Lemon Lovely yellow color is awesome. I would match it, though, not with a common blue, but an orange and pink." Oy. Blue is common, yes, but dark blue and bright yellow are nota common combination, especially for infants.

I know this could devolve into too many cooks spoiling the brew, of course. I suppose the only answer is to expand my line to incorporate the few of the suggested items I actually want to make. We're off to Wal-Mart later on for inspiration and measurement info for larger sizes (sewing patterns...)

200 Crochet Blocks & a purse...

I just finished this up today. Made two blocks from the book 200 Crochet Blocks for Blankets, Throws, & Afghans, then crocheted them together with a single crochet and did no-chain single crochet for the handle. So the joining and handle are all the same piece.

I used Caron's Simply Soft yarn & a 5mm hook. Each block came out 9" long, but it's fairly obvious by looking at them that they're not square. I was hoping I could recreate one or both to send off to the Crochet Dude for his Heartmade Blessings square drive, but those squares need to be 12" and, well, square. So, back to the drawing board on that.

I actually made a sale! The ZigZag Halter top is gone. I actually got a fair amount of interest in it, which means I need to make more. Especially in different sizes. I'm thinking of doing several different ones with the same basic top but a variety of stitches on the bottom. Right now, though, I'm working on a size 0 - 3 months Easter dress. On that one I'm thinking solid stitch bodice and a very full lacework skirt. I'll have to make a matching diaper cover...

#($&*@Y# Debbie Stoller and the horse she rode in on...

Excuse me if I fail to piddle myself in excitement over the release of Stitch & Bitch Crochet: the Happy Hooker. Ooh, Debbie Stoller, the Saviour of Knitting, is now going to rescue crocheting from the abyss of unhipness.

Riddle me this, Batman: Why does it have to be hip?

To quote Emily Dickinson, how boring to be somebody!

Yeah, I share my fellow hookers' consternation that crochet is so often seen as knitting's bastard stepchild. Hillbilly knitting, and all that. I hate having to dig through piles of knitting books to find the lone, lonely crochet book. I hate having to move aside even the cross stitch magazines in an effort to find Crochet Fantasy while Vogue Knitting occupies pride of place in the front row.

But I don't need to be saved by Debbie Stoller. I fail to see how a lifelong knitter "discovering" crochet and deciding to introduce it to her disciples is going to solve the issue of crocheting being considered a secondary craft. Snapping up a book that once again disses the history of our craft does no one any favors. "These aren't your grandma's doilies," indeed! (I swear, I'm gonna go up into a clock tower with a high-powered rifle and start picking off people with ugly scarves if I hear that line too much more often.)

Yes, crochet needs acceptance. But we need it on OUR terms. Not knitters' terms. We need to embrace doilies and afghans and yes even antimacassars and GRANNY SQUARES NOT USED IN A "NEW AND CREATIVE" WAY. The Lord's Prayer done in filet crochet using thread has at least as much artistic value as anything sporting Fun Fur.

In the meantime, let's embrace our craft as the unique thing it is. No, you won't see a photo of Kate Hudson crocheting a doily. So what? There used to be a time when the American spirit embodied individualism. To quote Cowboy Troy: Do your thang, baby, do your thang.

And I'm up and running...er, walking...er, limping along

BellaLinda Designs is now part of the MomsWhoThink Member Stores. Yay me. I have four items up right now...A total of 223 views...And not the slightest nibble. Sigh. I could lower my prices, but I don't want to. I work damn hard on my pieces, 99% of them are original designs, & the ones that aren't are so modified that they might as well be. I'm not going to undersell myself. Which, of course, means that I run the risk of not selling at all. Ah well. I'll have to take it if it comes down to that. At least I will have tried.

I've been working my butt off to get the store stocked, too. My latest projects are the Blue Bubbles Purse already in the store, and this:
This was a total pain in the ass to come up with. I am so anal about how I want my stuff to look. Especially with toddler clothes. I am violently allergic to "prostitot" clothing, so when I make stuff like this I have to make sure it's something I'm willing to let my daughters be seen in. That, and it's got to look good.

I started out crocheting it from the bottom up, using the block-and-offset-shell stitch. But I frogged that--and I honestly do not remember why--and started crocheting it from the sc portion so I could get all the shaping out of the way. I made the front, the straps, and the back (in that order), then sewed it all together and did the bottom portion in the round. Of course, that required frogging it multiple times until I got the stitch multiplier just right (it did not match what was given in the book!), then frogging it yet more multiple times until I got the pattern down. It actually moved rather quickly from there.

Now, technical info for those of you who are curious: This piece is crocheted in Caron's Simply Soft, using a 4.5mm hook. The top part is plain ol' single crochet, the bottom a ripple stitch done in the back loops only. Since I'm doing it all in one color, I wanted it to have some good definition to it, thus the ridged effect.

I will be writing the pattern up and posting it for sale along with the actual item. There are a few other crocheters on the site, with some luck I can make a bit of money off selling the patterns, if not the actual items.

Today also brought a trip to the bookstore, but I'll go into that more tomorrow.

Next project: a circular baby blankie in camouflage yarn.

In honor of St Valentine's Day...

Wish I had an FO to present, but I do not. I did, however, come across an interesting coincidence while out thrifting today. At our first stop I found The Complete Book of Crochet, with a copyright date of 1973. At our second, I found the Reader's Digest Complete Guide to Needlework, with a copyright of 1979.

My hubby was born in '73, I in '79. Finding books our ages is romantic in a geeky crochet sort of way...

More to the point, it also lets me go off on one of my favorite subjects: the myth of "modern" crochet. Each generation seems to like to think it's come up with whatever craft all on its own. This may have been true for crochet a couple hundred years ago, but not now. Folks were indeed making ugly ponchos back in the 1970s. I know, I know. Quelle suprise. I think ugly ponchos are one of the odd constants of design. Along with hideous hats.

But there are more subtle similarities. The older book, for instance, has a pattern for a "long evening skirt" that isn't wildly different in attitude from the famous spiderweb lace skirt over at Weird Mirror. Berets are still quite common, as are tote bags. And throw pillows.

There are differences, of course. The Complete Book of Crochet has a very large number of thread crochet patterns. Very nice, intricate ones. Yes, my dears, the dreaded doily. Sometimes I wish I had the patience for thread...

It's the second book I am most excited about, to be honest. And, you know, I can't think of a single book published today that follows up its directions for basic techniques with a discussion of designing your own garments! Oh, woe betide the old-fashioned crochet!

(I am secretly rubbing my hands together in glee over the macramé directions; I've been longing for a hanging macramé onion basket for longer than I care to admit...)

More interesting stuff from the second book...

The double chain stitch (otherwise known as chainless single crochet), a technique very few crocheters my age seem to have heard about, is herein presented as a crochet basic, as is a Solomon's knot (which they call a double knot stitch).

Their suggestion for a first project is not a scarf. I will repeat: NOT A SCARF. It's a tote bag. A striped tote bag. With purchased handles. Which means beginners are expected to be able to grasp the concepts of changing colors, shaping, and sewing. Which means crocheters are expected to be reasonably intelligent!

They give patterns for an oval, a triangle, a mitered-corner square, an octagon, and, elsewhere, a star. Do you have any idea how much trouble I had trying to find a coherent, non-openwork star pattern so I could make a stuffed star for my daughter for Christmas? I had to come up with my own!

There are also techniques I haven't seen clearly explained before. Like overlaid meshes, two different versions. One where you slipstitch across a mesh background. Very interesting look.

Getting back to that design thing...It tells you how to shape three different necklines (square, high round, and V)...Three different sleeves (set-in, raglan, & semi-raglan)...Four different techniques for ribbing, four different buttonhole techniques...I'm so happy. This book doesn't seem to exist in a newer edition past 1981. I really don't think there is anything comparable to this out today. This book managed to pack into only a few pages more information on garment-making techniques than even Donna Kooler's Encylcopedia of Crochet! I'm in love!

And this is what I'm working on right now:

Nice little banner, isn't it? Now I just need somewhere to put it! And stuff to sell!

It's been a dream of mine for a very long time to make a little extra money selling my crocheted things. I like making clothes for little ones, so it makes sense to me to specialize in this area.

I designed the above banner a few minutes ago. Took a little doing. Which I will now explain here because I am just that narcissistic, & who knows maybe someone else needs a mini class in banner design.

First thing I did was 'borrow' a banner ad from the website I intend to first have this on. This is to make certain I get just the right size. Then I opened it up in Paint Shop Pro 9, which is my graphics program. Added a layer. Opened up a graphic I'd already made, which is a clip of a close-up of one of my projects. Shrank it down so the height was exact (80 pixels). Pasted it on this new layer to cover up the old banner. Did a gaussian blur on it (2.5, for those interested in the techs). Opened up the photo of my daughter you see there on it. (Why this one? Because she's cute & that is one of my more original designs.) Resized it so the height was exact. Copied, pasted. Added in the text. Saved. Cursed myself for forgetting to rename the file, then went & renamed it.

Then PM'ed the owner of the site I spend most of my time on, MomsWhoThink, and asked her for specifics on price to advertise my fledgling business in my signature.

I'm sitting here now with a knot in my stomach, for no good reason. This is a huge step for me. I am so scared. Will my items sell? Are they good-enough quality? How on Earth do I keep proper records for tax purposes? Oy. Change scares the living crap out of me.

Wish me luck...

Neat find at Wal-Mart:

Saw this at Wal-Mart this evening. A pretty little toddler aloha dress with crochet trim. Ten-fifty is the price. A good price, but I can't bring myself to buy it when I can make it myself. But I couldn't resist taking a photo so I could show it online. Crochet really is starting to be everywhere!

Needless to say, from there we went right over to the craft section where I picked up some aloha fabric of my own (and if you want to be totally correct, btw, you'll stop calling them Hawaiian shirts & start calling them aloha shirts) and a cone of Sugar & Cream so I can make my own version.

This goes to prove, once again, my theory that crochet is very, very Hawaiian. You can't really tell from the picture (I took it pretty quick, since it looks strange to be photographing merchandise), but the bodice is a simple shell pattern.

My own version will be much plainer than this. My crochet skills are up to it, not so much my sewing skills. I may just go back and buy these some day soon. They're that cute. (And I'm not quite easy with the ethics of photographing something & then making my own version, but it's not like I intend to sell them or anything.)

In love with Leisure Arts...

I love Leisure Arts. Really I do. I especially love their relatively large books. Like In Love with Crochet, which I ordered from Amazon and which just arrived today.

This is unapologetically hokey stuff. It starts off with eight afghan patterns and segues right into four doilies. There are dishcloths. Fridgies. A filet crochet picture frame. And then there's my favorite: Quick Birthday Fairies. I used to have this book, you see, but it got lost somewhere along the way in one of our many moves. I have been tearing my hair out for a while now trying to find this particular pattern, as I wanted to make it for my older daughter back when she was an only (and she's turning four in a month, so that gives you an idea of how long it's been!). I knew I had it somewhere, but I didn't know where, and of course I couldn't find it because the book was lost. But now I have it again! So I am very happy to have ordered this book so I'd qualify for free shipping!

Sigh. I am such a happy little crochet nerd tonight...

Really, really belated.

I did actually finish the girls' Halloween costumes last year. In fact, this is how hard-core I am: I finished up Linda's while in active labor. (Not really bragging, I'm sure it's more evidence of how obsessive I am than anything else!)

But I didn't get to take them trick-or-treating because, well, I was sort of in the hospital after having given birth that day! I swear to you, though, that I was trying to get them to let me out of the hospital early so I could take them. Without, you know, actually saying "I know I had a baby eightteen hours ago, but I really want to go to the mall now."

I haven't posted the photos here before because I didn't have any good ones. They wore their costumes to the hospital on Halloween, and I do have photos of that, but nothing that really shows them off. But I'm rather proud of the designing that went into them, so I've been meaning to get better photos to post here. And I just did:


The ears were made by crocheting around purchased headbands and then attaching ears that were made over wire frames. Bobbie's skirt (the black one) was one I'd made her some time ago; I just crocheted the tail onto it. Linda's I made specifically for the costume. You can, unfortunately, tell that I was in quite a bit of pain as I was making her tail; it's kind of ratty looking. I think I overstuffed it. You can see a lot more of the stuffing in it than in Bobbie's. Still, though, I'm pretty happy with how it turned out.

And my stash...Most of that yarn came from Wal-Mart. By & large it's the cheap stuff. The 20 skeins we bought the other day cost no more than $3.84 apiece, and are much cheaper on the Mainland. (The Simply Soft I used to p ay $1.88 a skein for in Virginia; here it costs about a dollar more.) The few specialty yarns I have I bought at a 50% off sale at AC Moore, for the most part. I have paid full-price for almost none of my specialty yarns; I just can't afford to.

Oh, & I just thought of another place I have yarn...on the counter in my half-bathroom upstairs in my bedroom...I'm horribly forgetful. I've got a lot of stuff just waiting for the perfect project. Another reason I tend to make baby stuff is because I can only buy a skein or two of yarn at a time & I need a project that takes only that much.

Before I forget: I have the pattern for the overalls & long-sleeved shirt I made for one of the 'rescued' Cabbage Patch Kids for Christmas up on Crochetville. You can see it here.

Further proof my hubby loves me:

This is one of my yarn closets:
(Sorry about the strangeness of that first shot; I had to stand about 3 steps down on the staircase to get the whole length in.)

You will see I have a large complement of yarn. Also, that second shelf is crammed full of crochet books and magazines, and there are others floating around the house and one more on the way from Amazon.com.

This is not the only stash of yarn I've got. This is the other:
The second stash area is half of the top two shelves in the large closet across the hall from the small closet which is completely stuffed full of yarn and other crochet paraphernalia. You'll note that the plastic bags in the photos are filled with yarn and FOs and UFOs alike.

What this all has to do with my husband is this:
What this is, is the twenty skeins of yarn Robert bought me this afternoon. Ten of them are my absolute favorite yarn of all time Caron Simply Soft. The rest is Bernat Softee Baby & Red Heart Baby Soft.

This is upwards of a hundred dollars worth of yarn. Have I mentioned lately how I love our government's income redistribution program? (Commonly known as tax return season.) What a wonderful country, where you can pay slightly over a thousand dollars in taxes and have nearly six thousand returned to you. I am a Libertarian at heart, though, so all I can say is that I hope to one day be in a tax bracket high enough that I'm the one the government is taking money from...

Anyhoo, that's really not my point here. My point is that I love yarn. I have yarn scattered around the house. If I look under my monitor, I see a ball of yarn. If I look on top of the file cabinet by the stairs, I see 3 balls of yarn. If I look to the left of my monitor, there's a ball of yarn. On the coffee table are two skeins of yarn. On the dining room table there are several skeins. More are in my yarn tote in the kitchen. There are even two skeins out on the back lanai (don't ask).

I really need to start crocheting...!

Mystery Project Update

I have finished the first draft of my mystery project, and let's just say there are even more issues with it than I expected. There are some design quirks...I thought it was all done, but when trying to take a picture of it completed there was no way to get one that wasn't R-rated. So, back to the drawing board...

I rather like the way this turned out.

Another hat for Eleanore. Worked in Tunisian knit stitch using an M hook (yep, Annie's Attic Easy Tunisian; as if there's a difficult Tunisian out there somewhere) and Autumn Red Caron's Simply Soft. This is my favorite color of my favorite yarn.

The construction of this hat was amazingly simple. It is just a rectangle of TKS, top slst'ed to the bottom to make a tube, a scalloped edging done with a K hook at the bottom of the tube, then the top of it gathered til closed & tied. It's quite stretchy and very pretty. Looks so much more difficult than it really was.

I'm going to make one for Clara the same way, but using a deep purple yarn instead of the deep red. And if I have time, after that I'm going to make matching 1 Hour Baby Sweaters. I've actually made the sweater before, so perhaps this time it'll go faster.

I love any excuse to make baby stuff. I hope to get an online in-stock store up this year, so I can sell some of my own designs, and perhaps even my own patterns. We shall see. I'm determined to find a way to become a work-at-home mom instead of merely a stay-at-home one.

Clara's Hat

I have no idea which baby will wind up with which, of course, but I was thinking of the other one as Eleanore's, so it follows that this one is Clara's:
Same yarn & hook as before, of course. Same stitch multiple (6). Same stitch (HDC) used for the increase rounds.

The difference: The work even rounds are worked as 1SC, 1DC around, the crumple stitch I think it is called. And since the SCs stack upon the SCs and the DCs upon the DCs, it gives an interesting spiral/ribbed look to the hat.

The edging is sl st, 3 ch, sk 1, sl st around.

I hope these hats are deep enough to stay on.

I'll move on to matching ponchos tomorrow.

Ooh, I have an excuse to make hats.

Mindi from Mama Drama had twin girls earlier this year. Eleanore has a few medical problems and so has difficulty regulating her temperature. So Mindi put out the call for hats. It's pretty cool actually. She offered to pay for them, but everyone is giving her hats. Stuff like that makes me feel pretty good about mankind. I finally got Mindi's address yesterday, so I'm spending from now until next payday making stuff to send her. I'll take any excuse to make baby hats. I love baby hats, but it's too warm here for Esther to have a hat on. It's cold where Mindi is, so her babies would need hats no matter what. And since there's not only Eleanore but also Clara (and don't you just love those names?), I have an excuse to make twice as many hats.

I figure I can make about a hat a day. What fun. I've seen the twins in both matching stuff and coordinating stuff. So I think I will make them coordinating things. Same color, different styles, and vice versa. I started a hat yesterday but it was coming out odd-looking, so I frogged it and didn't get a chance to start back on it until today. But I was able to get the whole thing done today. I am so proud of myself. Eleanore's head is 16.5", and Annabel's head is the same measurement, so I have an easy model. And so:
I used Wool-Ease yarn and a 4mm hook. I don't like working with wool. I'm allergic to it. But I had to find somethingto do with the yarn. I've had it in my stash for ages. So...warm baby hat seems perfect. The main stitch is HDC, but the popcorns use DCs and there last row before the trim is SC.

I crocheted most of this while watching The Book of Daniel. For anyone who saw that, they freaking nailed Episcopalianism. We're not all stoned or drunk or messing around, but the...the irreverence of it was just wonderful. We tend not to take ourselves too seriously. I'm hoping someone will be talking about it at church on Sunday. I'd love to get the vicar's impression of it...I was rather afraid of how it'd present my denomination, since the pill-popping was obvious from the previews, & then USA Today mentioned most of the other problems, but it's pretty respectful. I mean, by Hollywood standards.
Ah well, this blog is crochet, not Christianity. But it's been literally years since I came across a TV show I care enough about that I think I'll be making an effort to actually be home when it's on so I can watch it.

So I set Cerberus aside...

Cerberus is a pain in the neck. I've got the torso done, but I'm having problems with the heads. I can't get even the first one to come together looking doglike enough. So I have put it aside for now. Here's hoping it doesn't disappear into the UFO ether...

And now, I introduce you to the Mystery Project, currently in progress:
What will this be? I'm not telling til it's done, thus the Mystery Project thing. It's not something I've ever done before. I'm using Simply Soft yarn, a 4.25mm hook, and a repeat of (4 sc, ch 2, sk 2 sts, 4 sc). I have plans on weaving something--not sure what just yet--through those chain spaces.


I set to work on my poor model. Annabel. Don't know if you remember her from prior entries (most recently, my blog about the lei I made my daughters for Christmas) . Annabel (named for the poem by Edgar Allan Poe) is older than I by quite a bit; she's in her 30s or 40s. I don't offhand remember quite the type of doll she is, but I've looked for her on eBay, and, well, I just cannot afford another copy. They start at roughly $100, and that's for ones in worse condition. Not that I'm going to sell her. I need to quit blogging when I'm falling asleep; I talk too much. Anyway, I promised last time she made an appearance that I was going to dress her, and I have. I've even made some small progress--through liberal use of rubbing alcohol, nail polish remover, & even a Clorox bleach pen--in removing the crayon from her face. I'm at a loss as to where to go from here in regards to that, but I thought I should show a picture of Annabel in much better condition. The dress she's wearing is one both my older daughters have worn in the past, so I'm rather attached to it. My favorite thing about this doll is that she wears "real" baby clothes. I used to go to the thrift store as a kid for the express purpose of buying her baby clothes. I am a nutcase.

One last gratuitous photograph:
Esther is becoming more interactive. She is slightly over two months old now. What that means is that she's now sometimes awake without either wailing like she's being killed or nursing.

I took this photo of her and one of her Christmas gifts this afternoon. This is pretty much as close as she comes to playing with toys right now. I wrap her hands around them and she tries to eat them. It's a lovely symbiosis.

This toy exhibits several design aspects I consider very important for baby toys. First off--there's really nothing that could come off. The face is embroidered on & tied securely on the inside. The antennae are likewise tied tightly and attached in a couple different ways. The yarn is soft to the touch (Simply Soft Brites, and why do they feel the need to misspell 'bright'?). There are places even the smallest baby can grab 'hold. It is also loosely stuffed, which makes it nice and squishy and is another way to make it easy to grab. The only problem with this piece in particular is I was in a rush so I used a larger hook than I should have; there's a bit of stuffing coming out the worm's butt. That's not a big issue at this point in time, however.